As we have noted, the ascriptions at the top of the various psalms were added much later than the original text, and it is frequently doubtful whether they are correct: but the header for Psalm 63, “A Psalm of David, when he was in the Wilderness of Judah,” seems to fit quite well with the opening verse: “O God, you are my God, I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water” (Psalm 63:1).

That’s because even when you are at risk of dying in the desert, what matters most is being in the presence of God. “Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you. So I will bless you as long as I live; I will lift up my hands and call on your name” (63:3-4). This is strong confidence, growing out of a securely established relationship: “you have been my help, and in the shadow of your wings I sing for joy. My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me” (63:7-8).

If David had managed to stop there, the psalm would be quite pretty. But because he was being harassed by his enemies, he went on to sing about their destruction: “those who seek my life shall go down into the depths of the earth; they shall be given over to the power of the sword, they shall be prey for jackals” (63:9-10). Please just make sure my enemies die and go to hell, God.

I get that. It makes the psalm much more human and real. We can recognize that it would always be better to long for God’s presence and pray for our enemies’ redemption: but sometimes that’s not really where our hearts are. The scriptures are not afraid to let us see David’s vindictive side, and that gives us a chance to recognize our own vindictive side as well: so that we can decide to pray “Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.”

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We need you, Lord, more than anything: more than comforts, more than money, more than victory over our opponents, more than life itself. That’s the truth, though we are so often reluctant to admit it. Help us; transform us; and hold us within your presence, that we may worship you forever.